Morgaine

Posts Tagged ‘depression’

Links for March 11th, 2007

In Too lazy to assign a category on March 11, 2007 at 6:19 pm

(tags: art video mlf)

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Suns signs as man, woman, child, boss and employee

(tags: astrology mlf)

Daily roads to inspiration

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Free Life Advice and Insights from Life and Business Coach Kammie Kobyleski

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Collection of links about Francesca Woodman

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Things to do instead of Killing Yourself

In Too lazy to assign a category on March 3, 2007 at 12:06 pm

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  • Drive in one direction until you reach the ocean.
  • Say hello to everyone you pass during the day.
  • Frown until your mouth muscles hurt (then see how much easier it is to smile.)
  • Create your own alphabet.
  • Start a scrapbook.
  • Make something you invented or invent something you can make.
  • Figure out if has no solution for non zero integers x, y, and z if n is an integer greater than two.
  • Make a BLT.
  • Work the crossword puzzle.
  • Count backwards from 10 billion by 13s.
  • Visit a yard sale.
  • Put on some really comfortable shoes. Walk somewhere in them.
  • Make something nice for someone and give it to them.
  • Go see a movie. (See two or three in a row. You may have to make extended visits to the restroom between films.)
  • Read The Lost Soul Companion.
  • Make your own list of things to do instead of killing yourself (and then do them.)
  • Organize your own mock funeral, invite family and friends, encourage them to eulogize you. (Tell them how you've really been feeling lately and see what happens.)
  • Let someone proofread your suicide note.
  • Build a fort.
  • Meditate.
  • Shampoo your hair. Repeat if desired.
  • Create an elaborate hoax. (Try not to get arrested.)
  • Get arrested.
  • Blow the stink off!
  • Sneak into a church. Enjoy the sunlight and quiet.
  • Write me a letter. (Be assured of a hopeful reply.)
  • Volunteer somewhere.
  • Doodle.
  • Enter a contest.
  • Write a poem.
  • Just breathe.
  • Take a class.
  • Finish something you started.
  • Drink a cup of tea with sugar and milk if that's how you like it.
  • Jump up and down on a big trampoline.
  • Pray.
  • Eat a tomato.
  • Pet a kitty cat.
  • Smoke a cigarette. (It's slower.)
  • Answer your telephone the next time it rings. (I know you haven't been…)
  • Ask a stranger for some good advice.
  • Paint a mural.
  • Start a garden.
  • Do the dishes. (It's OK if you've let them pile up. Wash a couple of them at least.)
  • Visit lostsoulcompanion.com.
  • Rescue an animal.
  • Take your loose change to the bank.
  • Play some beautiful music.
  • Ask an old person to tell you a story.
  • Make yourself breakfast in bed.
  • Eat cookies.
  • Stare at clouds.
  • Visit the maternity ward.
  • Send flowers anonymously.
  • Make a long to-do list. Do everything on it.
  • Set a world record.
  • Open the curtains.

Source

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Pain

In Too lazy to assign a category on January 9, 2007 at 3:56 pm

Wings

In Too lazy to assign a category on January 2, 2007 at 3:22 pm

Wings

"Don't build me a golden cage but give me wings to discover the world."

My mother gave this to me years ago. It's one of my favourite possessions.

I guess it's a variation on: if you love someone, set them free. It sure is how I tick. Try to pin me down, and the harder you try, the more you'll push me away. Sure, the cage may be golden, but I don't want to be caged, and I don't want to feel trapped. I don't want people to claim me.

It works on many levels. First there's the material level. When I was younger, I used to work in the diamond industry. There was an Indian guy that fell in love with me. At a certain point, he even wanted me to marry him. There was the huge diamond ring, there was the platinum credit card, there was the villa. All I had to do was say yes. But I didn't. Because I knew I would be living in a golden cage for the rest of my life, and while I might not know what I want out of life, I know it's not that.

It also works on a non material level. I don't want to mean the world to someone, because all too often it boils down to them making me (knowingly, or more often unknowingly) feel responsible for their happiness. I don't want to have to weigh my words all the time, because what I say might make them feel unhappy. I don't want to make someone feel miserable on purpose, but I can't stand the feeling of doing just that, no matter what I say. I don't like feeling that no matter how much time I spend on them, it's never enough. When that happens, I withdraw.

And I know, withdrawing might not be the best answer to such a situation, but it makes me panic. It makes me look for exits. Even while I might not want to get out, I worry and worry, I lie awake at night, and at a certain point, I even run into difficulty breathing. Then all I'm capable of is taking a (temporary) distance. To make it worse, other things going on in my life, might work as a catalyst. And of course, the other person is not going to understand.

Finally, it also works on a very personal level. I build a cage for myself. The cage might give me a (false) sense of safety, but who am I kidding? It only reinforces my anxieties, my fears. In 2007 I want to tear down my own personal cage, and step into the world, liberated, free to explore.

picture taken by me

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Optimism

In Too lazy to assign a category on December 30, 2006 at 12:18 pm

Artist's Comments:

'A disposition or tendency to look on the more favorable side of events or conditions and to expect the most favorable outcome'

'true optimism isn't just blind or crazy "isn't everything fantastic?" but a considered possibility within the realm of potential realisation' – IDeviant

source

Tracie pointed this out to me 🙂

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Tired

In Too lazy to assign a category on December 27, 2006 at 11:21 am

Tired

disclaimer: picture not taken by me, follow the link to the original flickr page

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